Synopsis of Traffic Jam

Written by Daniel

The season opens with Dewey giving a matter of fact explanation of his adventure to date, to a scarecrow. Meanwhile Hal is forced to let a Silver Toyota pass him by Lois, which seems fortunate once the car encounters the 18-wheeler up ahead. With that as the backdrop we learn life is pretty much the same no matter where Malcolm is.

Before we go on, Dewey is kidnapped by a snack food bandit who drops him off with the migrant workers, but he somehow winds up in a limo with some nice people. We don't get to see much of them, cuz Dewey needs to be a roadie before he is dropped off at his house by the bikers. This is after he drives the nice woman back to her 20 year dormant cigarette habit with his all around GWB approach to life. This leaves him in a Georgia parking lot prone to snack food bandits.

Speaking of snack food, Francis eats a hundred Candy Quacks, the pink kind. I ate 48(4 packs) once, I got sick, and I'm a 24 y.o. that still swallows sugar packets. He didn't win any points with his fellow inmates, not the most compelling side story.

"Ok, she's cute, she's smart, and she even lies to cops, I may be in over my head here." So begins Malcolm's ill fated romance with the Jessica. She does everything to win his heart, first she analyzes his faults, then pushes him down a hill. Jessica heals his wounds and Malcolm begins to ask her out but then he learns she's Canadian. He's distraught that he will never see her again, but when her car drives by she reaches out her window with her phone number.

I have to finish the rest of the story before I can finish Malcolm's part.

So after the car crash Malcolm and Reese discover an ice cream truck on the freeway. The ice cream man won't sell his ice cream on because it would be in violation of the law. Reese's reaction, "You can make money and please children? ... Pure Evil" We find out he's not a real American; I can say that because I'm a recent immigrant.

While this is happening Lois is having a problem dealing with the delay. When she commandeers a crane a cop tries to teach her a Zen lesson, there is lots of pop-psychology in this episode. Her response is to release Cujo by breaking the window of a random unclaimed SUV.

Cujo brings us to Hal who has one of his silly life crises, this time because he cheated death. He sees his salvation in a bird trapped in plastic, but when he releases it from it's bonds, the dog eats it. Reese gets more practice for his future life in organized crime when he stages an elaborate scheme to steal all the ice cream. He succeeds beautifully, but Cujo eats his spoils. Which brings us back to Malcolm, and his phone number, well you know.

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