Quotes from Casino

Malcolm: Dewey's gonna puke.
Hal: Geez, he's thrown up four times. You'd think he'd be empty by now.
Lois: We're almost there, honey. Just keep your head in the bucket.

Reese: Why do they have casinos?
Hal: I don't know, son, let's just thank God they do.

Malcolm: You're just doing this 'cause you hate kids!
Evil Pool Attendant: I'm really not, it's just a happy coincidence.

Malcolm: In our family we take the phrase "All you can eat" as a personal challenge.

Craig: Shouldn't you be in military school?
Francis: Shouldn't you not be in my father's robe?

Dewey: I don't like ghosts, they eat little boys.
Lois: That's ridiculous, there's no such thing as ghosts... except for that one that'll get you if you go up on the roof.

Lois: Have you ever had to recommend hemorrhoid cream to a complete stranger?!
Casino Guy: Do you want the prize or not?

Hal: Let's all get our bearing here, now here's the sun, what's it telling us?
Malcolm: That it's hot.

Craig: I've discovered a way you can travel free through the internet.
Francis: What you hacked into the airline reservation system?
Craig: No, that's illegal. I go to a chat room and pretend to be a really hot 18 year old girl.

Hal: Son, sometimes the genius thing gets a little annoying.

Hal: I want you to know that I love you boys very much.
Malcolm: He keeps saying that.

Reese: Oh great! Now I'm hallucinating, I see a cougar.
Malcolm: Don't be stupid, that's a puma!
All: Ahhhhhhh!
*Puma blows up*

Malcolm: Cougars don't just blow up!
Reese: As near as I can figure, I did it with my mind.
Malcolm: Reese, that's insane!
Reese: I wouldn't talk to me like that if I were you.

Malcolm: Okay, I just figured this out. Run!!!

Reese: You know what nobody's mentioned is that this is supposed to be the greatest army in the world, and you couldn't kill the three of us. I gotta tell ya, I'm not impressed.

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