Quotes from Grandma Sues/Lois is Pregnant
Compiled by Petch
Malcolm: "Francis and Piama came to visit at the same time Grandma is here. Eight people, seven sleeping places; guess who gets the shaft? This is my reward for being at the library when they asked for a volunteer."
Ida: "Ha! Wolves should rip out your throat!"
Lois: "Reese, I asked you to rake these leaves."
Reese: "I'm waiting for the rest of them to fall first."
Dewey: "We'll miss you."
Ida: "Even the little one lies."
Malcolm: "I was so close to sleeping in the house again. I forgot what a bed feels like."
Reese: "Tell you what. Punch yourself in the face. (Dewey does.) Okay, you're in."
Piama: "My family's still worse. My mom faked stomach cancer so she wouldn't get custody."
Francis: "Useless, miserable money-grubbing old hag!"
Ida: "Keep talking, tough boy. I sue you, too."
Hal: "I've had it! I'm going to toss her out on her cage!"
Lois: "Hal, we can't do that, she's my mother....my twisted, horrible monster of a mother."
Doctor: "Well, I think I've figured out why you're feeling so lousy, Lois. You're pregnant."
Hal: "If this baby's half as bad as our least bad one, we're still ruined!"
Piama: "There's no lock?"
Francis: "For my brothers? They just got the door back a few months ago."
Malcolm: "Sleeping is the only thing that makes my life worthwhile. I can dream I'm somewhere decent."
Hal: "Dewey, go easy on the orange juice. That stuff doesn't grow on--wait, it does! So why is it so damn expensive?"
Reese: "They know about the thing!"
Dewey: "Shut up. It's probably a different thing."
Malcolm: "Nobody should know a beetle tastes better than a june bug."
Ida: "Did you hear that? He called me evil. I want that on record."
Piama: "You're pregnant?"
Dewey: (screeching) "Noooooooooo !!!
Lois: (furious) "I cannot believe you boys! This is the way you react to wonderful news? This is a blessing !!!"
Reese: "I bought us an above-ground swimming pool. And the best part is, you don't have to pay for it for six months."
Dewey: "All I ever had was being the youngest. Now I won't even have that."
Ida: (indicating lawyer's assistant) "How much is she costing me? I'm not paying for your little tart of a girlfriend."
Lawyer: "Now, I don't mind tossing innocent people into the street. I just don't do it for free."
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