Synopsis of Lois's Makeover


Written by Petch

A 'secret shopper evaluation' of Lucky Aide employees has Craig rattled. Lois' reassurances that it's no big deal are shortly repudiated when her own written assessment praises her job performance but questions her personal hygiene and 'slovenly' appearance. Craig, meanwhile, gets a predictably mediocre review, which transforms him into an obsequious and overbearing Steppin-Fetchit to customers, while Lois unwillingly submits to a make-over at the cosmetic counter. The result is a garish and gaudy Lois who is clearly unhappy with her new look, although her male co-workers take a newfound shine to her....not to mention the lusty reaction Hal lays on her when she gets home.

Hal's day has thus far been spent on the basketball court with Malcolm, Reese and Dewey, where he's been whipping their butts in shooting hoops, much as he's done since they were old enough to play. After their game subsides, Malcolm and Reese, who usually minimize their younger brother's involvement in the game, catch site of a lone Dewey shooting perfect hoops. They decide to make him their secret weapon for their next round against Hal, and it works like a charm. They start scoring baskets....until Hal starts cheating with physical fouls. Still, the boys are getting better during their at-home practice sessions, and when Hal conveniently twists his ankle, the boys suspicion that he's faking in order to get out of playing them again....or is he?

At the Alaska logging camp, meanwhile, Francis happens to kill a few rats that have been rooting through the loggers' cabins, which suddenly makes him a Rambo-esque rat-killer. He is the toast of the compound until a gauntlet is thrown down: Is he willing to take on Rose-Marie, a legendary and gargantuan rat that lurks somewhere beneath the floorboards? After accepting the challenge, Francis is on his belly in the crawlspace beneath the floor when he sees a lone baby rat. Trouble is, the baby rat has just emerged from behind a rotted plank, behind which are hundreds of rats which suddenly emerge and pounce on Francis. His piercing screams transcend the cabin, the logging compound, the township and possibly even Alaska itself. I'm not doing the sequence any justice here; it has to be seen to be appreciated.

Back at home, Hal's laid-up schtick is short-lived, as Dewey catches sight of a clearly non-injured Hal during some very energetic hoops practice on the carport. Back on the court, he and the boys are neck-and-neck in a game punctuated by numerous fouls by Hal. The score is tabulated by chalk-writing on the asphalt: "Us" vs. "Faker." Finally, with the score tied, the boys try a little foul-play of their own, scoring the winning hoop after Reese punches Hal in the groin. The three brothers leave their dad writhing on the court as they bask in their glory.

Fed up with her tarted-up appearance, Lois is outside the Lucky Aide and about to confront her manager when an anonymous pedestrian propositions her for a prostitute tryst. Delighted that she's got ammunition to protest the mandated make-over, she marches the would-be trick into Mr. Fisher's office and proclaims that she's been mistaken for a hooker and that she will be going back to her regular appearance, like it or not. After she leaves, Mr. Fisher stares down the would-be trick--who just happens to be his brother-in-law. Sister's not going to like this.

At the episode's conclusion, Lois is happily back to her old self, cleaning house and bitching about the family's messy habits. She casually adorns a baseball cap above her makeup-free face, which naturally elicits the expected lusty reaction from Hal....again.


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