Quotes from Poker #2
Compiled by Petch
Lois: "Oh, honey, please not tonight. It's freezing."
Hal: "What do you think, more salt? More cillantro? A litle zing of Tabasco?"
Reese: "It's perfect. I can't taste anymore."
Hal: "I want you and those girls in your room all night with the door closed. Got it?"
Reese: (to Malcolm) "There's your birthday present."
Brian: "Your father and I have to conduct some business. It seems that he has some of my money in his wallet."
Hal: "Bring it on."
Chandra: "Listen, just because my dad dragged us to this dump doesn't mean we have to talk to you."
Kristen: "Just show us where we can sit where we won't catch fleas."
Malik: "Did you hear the one about the astronaut and the hooker?"
Dewey: "Yeah. I didn't get it."
Hal: "Dewey, I told you to stay in your room."
Hal: "Malcolm has an IQ of 165."
Malik: "We know. You've been using that for six months."
Reese: "You think they'll offer to change his diapers?"
Malcolm: "I can't believe Stevie's putting up with this."
Reese: "You know what? I'll take care of it."
Abe: "That didn't beat Malik."
Brian: "So Malik wins the breath-holding, Abe got the most dip on the chip, Trey has the longest neck, Steve has the highest socks, and Hal....well, Hal has nothing so far."
Malcolm: "You're pimping a fatal disease to take advantage of a girl."
Reese: "For good."
Chandra: "Stevie, this is so unfair."
Stevie: "I have....no regrets. Well....one."
Eric: "One suspicious conversation, and immediately I'm picturing sweaty bodies rolling around in front of a fireplace. God, I've got a lot of growing up to do."
Stevie: (as Backstreet Boys music plays) "The music....helps regulate....my heartbeat."
Reese: "I just have to go call his vitals in to the doctor."
Kristen: "Don't you have anything in this house that isn't junk?"
Malcolm: "No."
Hal: "You're perfectly happy just closing off and not sharing your feelings!"
Malik: "Why don't you just get off my back?"
Hal: "There it is! You're shutting me out. Why can't you just talk to me?"
Malik: "So that you can just twist my words around and just throw them back at me?"
Hal: "How many times do I have to apologize for that ?!"
Malik: "You've been drinking, haven't you?"
Piama: "It's a funny story, Francis. And he loves telling it, don't you, dad?"
Francis: "Dad?"
Piama: "Yup."
Francis: "I just....Oh, I'm-I'm so sorry. I just....I mean, it's a real pleasure to meet you, sir."
Enoch: "Do you have any money?"
Francis: "No."
Enoch: "Well, tonight's been a big ball of nothing."
Stevie: "You're so....alive. Can I....tongue-kiss you?"
Chandra: "What?"
Dewey: "Normally I don't mind being a snitch, but this even makes me sad."
Back to episode info