Quotes from Malcolm Babysits

Lois: "I'll tell you what they're going to pay you, they're going to pay you what all jobs pay, less than you're worth and just enough to keep you crawling back for more."

Malcolm: "That's the way discussions go down in this family. I tell them my needs, and they say no. Then dad reveals another cartoon character he's afraid of."

Lois: "Once upon a time there was a little boy who made his mother so crazy she decided to sell him to the circus."
Dewey: "The evil circus?"
Lois: "No, the nice one with monkeys."

Francis: "So, what did my mom send me? Bug-infested cookies. As usual, a mixed message."

Hal: "I think you should apologize."
Lois: "You know, i didn't hear you apologizing to me when you used up all the liquid in the chemical toilet."
Hal: "Well, we have your taco casserole to thank for that, don't we?"

Hal: "Look at that sky, Malcolm. Just think, somewhere out there, all those stars and planets, there might be at this very moment a space dad who just got kicked out of his space trailer, who's looking down on us... or would it be up at us? Or maybe sideways...."
Malcolm: "Trust me, dad, they're all looking down on us."

Hal: "So how's the job going?"
Malcolm: "They were jerks, so I quit."
Hal: "That's pretty much what work is. Welcome to the club."

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